Uncommon Courage

Why we should all talk to strangers with Kerrie Phipps

September 02, 2021 Andrea T Edwards Episode 6
Uncommon Courage
Why we should all talk to strangers with Kerrie Phipps
Show Notes Transcript

Talking to strangers – why would anyone want to do that? Well the science is in, and it’s a game changer for societies. It boosts mental health, makes people more compassionate and empathetic, and it unites divisions that exists between us. Talking to strangers transforms lives. 

An expert on the importance of embracing a mindset of speaking to strangers is Kerrie Phipps. Remember Malcolm Gladwell’s book ‘Talking to Strangers”? Well it didn’t have the action points, so Kerrie, who had already published ‘Do Talk to Strangers’ thought it was high time to share the how, in her newest book ‘How to Talk to Strangers.’

So wonderful to have this opportunity to speak with Kerrie, on life as a country gal from Australia, who felt like a failure as a young lady due to many heart wrenching experiences, but one of the reasons I adore Kerrie is she never gave up on the journey of life, and she embraced every opportunity, growing into a global professional speaker, coach and multi-book author! Not bad for a gal from Dubbo who didn’t have much confidence growing up. 

Kerrie is an awesome human, I call her The Great Encourager, and I recommend you listen, follow and support the beautiful work she does.  

Get in touch with Kerrie

Her Website https://kerriephipps.com/ 

Her new book ‘How to Talk to Strangers’ is available here https://www.amazon.com/How-Talk-Strangers-Confidence-Difference/dp/0994157347/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=kerrie+phipps&qid=1630573996&sr=8-1 

And you can find her podcast here https://kerriephipps.com/podcast/ 

 

#KerriePhipps #HowToTalkToStrangers #UncommonCourage 

This is an AI transcript and will not be perfect.

Well, hello, my lovelies, I am so excited today to introduce you to a very dear friend. Her name is Carrie Phipps. And one of the things that I love about Carrie. And there are many, many, many things I love about Carrie is that I call her the great encourager, when Karis in the room, she's going to tell you how fabulous you are, she's going to show you a past that you might not see in yourself, she's going to see the light that's in you. And she's not afraid to tell you about that light. And I think it's one of the most beautiful qualities, a person can have to see a light in another person, and to help them believe in it. Because we can all do that for each other. It's actually a really easy thing to do. And Carrie is one of those people, she just doesn't naturally It's beautiful. It's sincere. And it's one of the many things like I said, that make her very, very special. So Carrie, thank you for agreeing to be on my podcast. And welcome. Thank
you, Andrea, you've already got me feeling choked up. I think I have a sense of the kind of conversation that we could have Andrew here, and it's not just sitting on your balcony hot, too hot with the two of us. But we're inviting other friends into hear this. So I feel a little nervous and
so honored and moved by what you just shared. That's so true. It's so true. And the other reason, of course, that I really wanted to interview you today. And you know, I'm just getting this podcast started and building an audience. I appreciate you taking the time. But Carrie has just launched a book called How to talk to strangers. And our I'll put a link to the book with the podcast. So she's written this book, but then there's a whole bunch of contributors are also great friends, people like Annie Cohen, Kathy, there's so many amazing people who've contributed wonderful stories in this book. And I remember when Carrie and I first met, and she told me her theme was talking to strangers. And I was like, Oh my God, why would you want to do that? Because I've had those many, many experiences where I've like been sitting on a plane and some weirdos talking to me, and I can't get away from them because I'm on the plane for 12 hours. But as I've gotten to know, Carrie over the years and watched what she does, the message is so so so much deeper than just you know, randomly talking to people on the street. It's very meaningful. And it's also backed by science. So I'm looking forward to talking about your book. But can we begin with your extraordinary story, the girl from dubbo, which is a town, a country town in Australia, and I also grew up in the country in Victoria. But can we talk about your upbringing in your I mean, you could have gotten lost on the way but you didn't you because you too gutsy for that. So I was for a while. Yeah, but I think being lost in finding a party's part of what I admire about you. So tell us your story.
Thank you. Well, I was born in Dubai. But just because the ganda country hospital didn't have pets at that time. So my parents had a farm. I still I still have a farm at 75 out of Uganda, which is one hour from Davao and yeah, Central West New South Wales. So halfway between Melbourne and Brisbane, and unbelievably, some people do that huge road trip, I think my longest road trips like 14 hours in Australia. So growing up in the country, I think such a privilege. But of course when we're young, we don't know what our privileges and I guess we can be older as well and be aware of our privilege, but you know, I felt quite inadequate being a farm girl because I would put the word just in front of it, you know, just a farm girl, because I would compare myself to my friends in town and you know, often felt like the odd one out, you know, in some ways I was the odd one out in a great way My dad was like the most fun dad he built the school playground equipment you know, before things had to have all the government accreditation. He just made monkey bars and like awesome things to climb on. And he was a PT instructor in the army. So there was like Chin up bars, there was everything. So the upbringing on the farm was really amazing. I loved climbing trees and sitting in a tree for hours reading a book, and not such a fan of some of the farm work like milking the cow in the mornings. But farm life was quite beautiful, because we played hard just as we worked hard, but school had a quite a few traumas involved. And, you know, thinking just the other day we had in the local news a 16 year old girl died. For an asthma attack, and it just took me back, I guess sometimes we think that, you know, society is advanced in different ways. And we've solved different problems. And we have this spend so much progress. But when I was 16, I lost my best friend to asthma attack, actually, a year before that, I lost a mutual friend of ours in a car accident. And, you know, those things are pretty devastating. And you know, school life was there was some horrendous bullying going on. So I think I learned quite quickly to not speak up don't have an opinion about something that doesn't disagree with the louder voices. So I guess I was just always one of the quieter voices, however, that honed my attention to people who are on the outside who, you know, might have been without friends, or you know, might have seen them being teased or isolated by others. So I would go in, I guess, to rescue and I've always been home, you know, stray animals. And I guess it was the same with people. And my dad is like that as well. Like he would meet a stranger, like up on the highway or in town and say, you know, come out to the farm for a cup of tea. And, you know, do you want to just park the vehicle here and stay for a few nights and so we've met so many people from all over the world. Really?
I gotta tell you something that's so amazing, because my dad used to do exactly the same thing. We'd always have these backpackers putting the tents up in the backyard. And so yeah, we couldn't afford to go overseas when we were children, our family, we're never wealthy, right? Yeah. But the world used to come to us and it was brilliant. And it was something that I really cherish for my childhood that exposure to otherness right away I got so addicted to it later on Kiko
reminded me now It wasn't just backpackers, it was people who like, had to go to prison for a few years. So that asked, dad could they just leave their truck at his place, and, like, people's stories are just so interesting. And you know, sometimes there's like a truck, just avoiding the police because his load was too high. So he'd come and park it there, you know, stay at the farm overnight, and then be on his way the next day with half of his float and then come back a few weeks later for the rest of it, you know, so we just get to know all these different stories, you know, end up going for hot air balloon rides and airplane rides, you know, the old oh my gosh, I can't think of the name of them yet really old, like world war two planes? Oh, well take them off, because you're riding a Tiger Moth or some other little old old plane and that take off and land on the farm. So yeah, so much adventure there. But with people I wasn't confident at all, you know, well, my parents demonstrated, you know, welcome and hospitality. And I was fine with that one on one but always very intimidated in a group or even just two people. I'd be terrified talking to two people at once. Because I felt so looked at I suppose, you know, when there's two people looking at you waiting for an answer, I would feel quite intimidated. And always the least in the group.
Is it the isolation of growing up on a farm that you think contributed to that, or just personality? What do you think?
I think probably a lot of damage was done in school? Yeah. Because we think that, you know, the louder voices are the ones that make sense that because everyone's following them, we just think, oh, they must be right. So if they're saying that I'm the ugliest, skelet score, or that I'm useless, or, you know, stupid, or something, we take it on, like we, we don't think to challenge those things, if there seems to be, you know, social agreement by by others, but the others are just not speaking up because they're scared also. So I think I just took on messages from others, and we don't value our parents messages. I'd say to Mom, I can't go to school and the ugliest one there. And she'd be saying, No, you're really pretty. I'm like, you're just saying that because you're my mom hearing that exact line in a beautiful movie. Like it's got one. And you know, the child has scarring and disability, and he's not wanting to go to school because he's ugly, and and she's like, you're not. And yet he says, You're just saying that cuz you're my mom, I saw just the ad, the trailer for that movie and just started crying. It's like, Oh, my gosh, I just relate to that and seeing the mother's heartbreak, like how do you encourage someone who refuses to listen to your encouragement. And I guess that also helped me to not just encourage somebody, but really make sure they knew that I was saying this, because I believed it, just like you did at the beginning of this conversation, you know, when I would share with somebody the light that I see in them that their possibilities, their their gifts and talents in the way that they show up in the world that is beautiful. And I might make a comment and say, Oh, no, no, because a lot of other people put themselves down to it's not just me. And, you know, I find myself saying, showing evidence for what I saw, you know, Andrea, it's not just that I would say, you know, you're so inspiring and you know, really motivating because you will just go I hope so but by giving you evidence if I say you know the way that you take the time to respond to people, you know, on LinkedIn on Facebook, like where people might be disagreeing with you and you're being gracious and you're just sharing with them another perspective. You know, I can give you specific reasons for you to believe what it is that I'm saying about you than just a shallow like, you know, I you're fantastic. You're so great.
Yeah, it's absolutely it's got to be from a genuine place. If it's not from a genuine place. It's not worth doing, but when it is from a genuine place, it's even more powerful. Because going back to high school, so high school is such an interesting place. So I lived across a border Victoria New South Wales. So I went to a different High School in a different state. And so when I turned up, I was invisible. No one really knew who I was. And then as time went on, there was a boy that was interested in me and this other girl was interested in him. And then I became the target of bullying. And it was horrible. But what I did was I started bodybuilding, because I figured if I and I had a mohawk, I was very beautiful. But my whole sort of, I don't know if I was consciously deciding it, but basically trying to get the attention away from me. And then I became physically strong, not tough, because I'd never heard of IRA, but it kind of changed people's sort of attitude towards me, which was great. But then I started to address the bullies. So I was the person that did speak up I was the person said, Now this is bullshit. We're not doing this, you know, that consensus, the social consensus that comes with the loudest voices, because it goes out into business, right? We say it all the time. In business, the loudest voice is the one that's heard, whereas to me, some of the most powerful voices in an organization often come from the people who are incredibly introverted, and very deeply thoughtful and reflective. And we need to always create the space for them to be able to speak not the way us as speakers like we both speak up now. Right? Not the way we want to the way they feel comfortable contributing it, which is often more one on one, right? And, but for younger girls and boys school, you know, like following that half the problem in the world right now is the fact that we mute and allow the bigger voices, the louder voices, even when we disagree with them, we've got to step into the courage of speaking out whenever we can. And it's not Yeah, it's not comfortable. But it gets easier. The more you do it, if you don't agree, speak up, you know, we need more of that we absolutely need more of that of all ages. But I'd love to talk more to school kids about that time, you know, maybe you want to do some stuff for that the girls, right? Because it's brutal, because beyond the school, then how did that impact you? And what was next?
Well, I didn't finish school because of bullying. I completed the nine. So I had just turned 15 at the end of the year, and mom and dad didn't want me going back to school, they wanted me to do homeschooling. And you know, I'm like, What about boarding school and mom was like, No, because she knew I was in a very vulnerable place. So I'd actually been sexually assaulted at 14, I just turned 14. And, and this is not something that I genuinely share. But you know, universities. So here we go, you know, and I was so filled with shame. I didn't talk about that for you know, six months, but you know, I became so suicidal. And I shared it with one person at school, who I trusted, who I thought was like one of the sensible boys, but he was behaving in an unsensible manner at the time. And I was like, please just leave me alone and give me space. And anyway, so it came out, then suddenly, all the school was talking about it. And I felt like the only person in town that this ever happened to like, it was unheard of it was like not talked about. And so, you know, I felt so in the spotlight in the worst way, because no one knew what to do with that. And so they were mocking me, and particularly the boys, the girls were all huddled in groups just going on night, we had no idea. And you know, they didn't know what to do. But it was very, very challenging. And I really was just wanting to escape. And you know, I thought about running away from home, but I just wanted to end it all. I just wanted to die. I just could not see any future for myself beyond that time. You know, when you're in school when you're 1415. That's your world. And when it's in absolute crisis mode, then you don't know where to turn. So nobody was talking about you can put your hand up and say, you know, me too. how that feels. Yeah, so when my parents did find out, they were really supportive that it was still awkward. Anyway, I ended up running away from home at 16, I would have left on my 16th birthday just to be legal, but my mother gave me a beautiful watch. So I'm like, Okay, well, let's just read for like, leave now. So I'll wait a week, then they might be quite so brokenhearted if I just disappear in the middle of the night. So I did that work. My parents ended up going back home about a month later. And because I couldn't get any work in double, I think I just assumed that that would be easy. And I wouldn't do a TAFE course which is really funny because it's like, what do you do when you can't you're not gonna fit in at school? So you do TAFE and in a country school, you know, the colleges are offering? Yes, pretty much secretarial skills. So that's what I did. Which is so funny because I've never been really secretarial You know, you're not
secretarial material. certificate and show of hands just just for those who don't aren't aware of Australia. TAFE is what's the acronym? It's like technical education
and further education. Yeah, yeah. So you know, I could have been a hairdresser or but I think secretarial was kind of the thing so don't attach tight and you know, created myself a forged ID it's really naughty. You know, I wouldn't got a job in Davao when the teacher at the TAFE teacher said to me, you'll be the last person in this class to get a job and it just Yeah, I don't know if that was her intention or if she just was exasperated, but I had started like skipping classes and hanging out with the wrong people doing the wrong things. Yeah. When she said that I took the next day off tape and went into debate with my resume that I've created and just went door to door and when I walked into a dental practice, not knowing that was my family's dentist because they would come out to Uganda. The dentist knew my grandparents from when they were newlyweds and had my dad As a young baby, so he knew the family very well. So he hired me on the spot. So I went back to TAFE. And I said, Well, I have a job. I'm a dental nurse, starting in January. And so yeah, my my second move away from home was with my parents blessing and support. And yeah, became a dental nurse, which was a really good grounding in just being with people and helping people like reduce anxiety, because a lot of people would go into a dental practice, very fearful, some of them had grown up with terrifying stories of the dentist, and I would see parents come in with their kids and say, really silly things like, Oh, he's gonna come with a big needle, and I gave the kids the past their fear onto their kids. And I think I was just tucking away all of these lessons, you know, from from that time, and, you know, and then training other nurses and interviewing them for jobs. And there was a lot of leadership development in that role. And I was there for five years, my husband, who is now my husband of 27 years, yeah, we've grown a lot together. And that's another whole story I first 10 years was super challenging, like I wanted to run away in the first six months, but I also just had this determination and resilience. And I think the modeling of my parents and his parents, and my grandparents, like long term marriages, and also I wasn't going to tell anyone that I was struggling, that's all I could run away, if I could just get back to the farm for a weekend. But then I'd have to tell mom and dad that like, I'm not a good wife. So we kind of stated we did things out, which I'm really grateful for. But I think because we've both had that determination to figure it out. We just kept moving forward.
I'm glad you do, because he's such a wonderful couple. So in summary, I'm listening to right. So first of all, if you're at a point where you don't think there's any hope there's always hope, keep going, keep fighting, keep looking. The other thing is, you know, yeah, we all make stupid mistakes, right? And it sounds like yeah, your parents pretty painful years for them. I mean, all parents deal with annoying teenagers as they grow up and try and work out how to be grown ups. Right, I'm going through right now with my 13 and 14 year old, it's like, oh, yeah, but that's, you know, keeping patient love and patience. That's I'm also with my children. But the other thing is, you know, those those bloody teachers who say, to say, to a person, remember me, you know, it motivated you, but that you got no hope we had a school counselor, or were at my school. And, you know, they told you what your path would be, and I'm so wrong on so many suffer so many of us, you know, but if you use that negative input to defy them, and go and prove them wrong, I mean, that if you want to motivate me, tell me I can't do something, right. So it can work. But I don't necessarily believe that was their intention.
Can I just share with you something because that propels me forward to another moment like that, but also takes me back to one highlight of my three years of high school was work experience. And so I went to the travel agent in Davao. And so I had one week there, and I had to unpack the magazines that came in every day and put them up on display. And that's the first time I've heard of Phuket where you're living and where I've spent time with you. And so I saw this brochure that had Phuket and had this incredible, you know, white sandy beach and blue sky and palm trees. And it just captured my attention on like, one day and going to Phuket. And then, yeah, we were considering living there in 2020. Right away.
Yeah. But I think that's the beauty of the journey of life. There's all these inputs, right? And it's about paying attention to the inputs. And you know, the leadership lessons. As a dental nurse, I couldn't think of anything worse than being a dental nurse. But by the way, I'm a really cool parent with my kids in the dental chair, because I don't want them to have my fee. Yeah, so I'm really cool. And, you know, get them to be brave. And my number one thing has always been, I don't want them to be scared of a needle. Because, yes, so crippled by that year. So I'm very conscious of not projecting onto them my own stuff. I'm very cool with needles, but dentists, I could I could do without a dental visit. But, but I love I love what you said about how you learn so many different leadership qualities. And you know, and that's that was your springboard into all these other stuff that's happening since right? Yeah.
So come on, give the next bit. So if I can skip ahead to when I was 30. And a doctor said to me, Well, you probably won't work for five or 10 years. So they had no answers. For me. I was in chronic ran out, I had chronic fatigue had a virus from Asia that they couldn't diagnose that they just kind of wrote me off because I ticked all the boxes for chronic fatigue. And they didn't understand burnout. But a psychologist friend of mine had asked me to do some tests, and I was in chronic burnout. But when the doctor said, Oh, when you went work for five or 10 years like that with the same kind of rebellious fire that the school teacher had, and while the doctors didn't have answers for me, I, you know, went to natural therapies. And I was like, on this journey of, you know, how do I recover? And I felt like, in a way, I had to recover from like, 10 years of completely giving myself to an organization where I was, you know, I was just working way, way, way too much because I loved people because I wanted to help and because I couldn't say no, because things were justified. Well, you know, Carrie can do it, because she's here and so I just was taking on way too much. And suddenly, I have no no job. You know what I thought I was gonna do forever. And yeah, that got me asking, Well, where do I go from here? And that's when I came across coaching. And I just found that I didn't have to have the answers for people. I just had to ask the questions to help, you know, have this framework to help people move forward. And I was like, This is what I've been looking for my entire life, but I didn't know it was the thing though. Having you know, worked in You know, family, with families and communities and in ministry and all the expectations of leadership, and then to have the answers, I have wisdom for people, it was exhausting. And now I have a framework where I can say, you know, what lights you up? What do you feel inspired to do? And you know, how can we create some solutions around that so you can move forward and typesetters show up with like a mirror to their thinking. And so clients are just getting amazing outcomes. I was getting amazing outcomes from my own work with a coach, it changed my parenting. Thankfully, Ethan was only four when I started coaching. And I know that was such a gift for my parenting, even if I didn't coach anybody else. Yeah, I've had clients with extraordinary results. And they've published books, and they've traveled the world, and they've done amazing things. But I'm so grateful for that shift in mindset to empower people to do their own thinking. That's for my parenting and for my relationship with Linda and my family relationships. So that was an extraordinary gift that came out of a very dark time. Yeah.
So we met what, five, six years ago in Singapore through our community as professional speakers. So Kerry's a professional speaker, she's also a professional coach, she's an author, and you've done all sorts of things. But your first book, which I love, so one of the things that I've so I've lived and worked around the world for, I think, 27 years, so more than half my life now. And the most successful Australians I've ever met in my life all come from country, Australia. So there's something about the upbringing that we all got in country, Australia, that gave us the resilience and the determination. And the people you know, the people I've met, they just they they have no limits to their dreams. It's amazing. And, and today, you're one of them. But the very first thing you did was write a book about regional New South Wales, right? Was it regional New South Wales, or regional Australia,
regional Australia? But that's actually my second book. Oh, okay. That's Kpop. You've written a few. Yeah. And I did that, because I found that, you know, I'm going to conferences around Australia that were, you know, coaching and speaking conferences, you know, business development, and people would say things like, you know, you're from Davao? Like, how do you build an international business when you're from dubbo, because, you know, very quickly, in the coaching world, I became a mentor. For other coaches, I was, you know, involved in the training courses that I'd been through as a participant than I stepped up as an assistant trainer, then there's the mentoring and consulting, you know, for other people wanting to train as a coach. And so that connected me with a global audience. And people say, how do you build an international business from your front? You know, like, I would think, well, we have the internet and an airport, five minutes from home. what's the what's the challenge, but I also knew that I had limitations. You know, like, I was in Singapore in 2006. And I was speaking to a room of people interested in coaching, but before anyone came in the room, and I'm standing there with the CEO of results, coaching systems, now, it's not the neuro leadership group, you know, David's briefing me on, you know, say handphone, not mobile phone, like we do in Australia, cell phone or hand phone, and, you know, turn those off. And just a few cultural things that he shared about speaking to an audience in Singapore. And I said, should someone else be doing this? Like, I don't want to tread on any toes? Because I had this conversation in my head, like, I'm just a country get like, how did I get here? It was a very short notice request to go over to Singapore and Assam suddenly there and I'm like, Oh, my gosh, this shouldn't be me. Why am I doing this? Anybody else? It's better at this. And David, when I said, You know, I don't want to tread on any toes. He just said, carry on a toes, just get on with it. Something like that. It's like a super direct it just it was like this limitation. And this, this voice on my shoulders saying, Who are you to do this? You're just a country now. It just fell off. I just felt like I stepped up. It was a step up moment. Yeah. And Singapore has actually been so pivotal in so many ways over the years. And yeah, that moment in 2006 was, was one of those moments where I just let go of the inhibition of being a country girl and saw the benefits of it. Like you said, people from the country, they're resilient, they're creative, they're problem solvers. They're connectors. And so I started to celebrate that. And so yeah, it was like 2009 when I had the idea of working with a publisher to publish, lifting the lid on quiet achievers, success stories of regional entrepreneurs, because I saw so many inspiring stories that were not being told because people were just adding their businesses doing their thing, building a globally influencing business that they might not necessarily travel, but they are making a difference right across Australia and the world.
And I think one of the things that we're going to definitely see rising in the future is people saying I don't need to be in a city anymore. One of the gifts of COVID right so we're gonna see migration out of the cities. So the whole Smart City thing the whole focus of everyone clustering in one place just been ours in cars driving to and from the office, all that horrible side of life that I've spent my all of my life avoiding and escaping, right? I really have because I just I can't stand the wasted time and it was horrible. We just lines crowds. I don't like you know, going pick our traffic on a train. It's just too close for me. And so I've spent basically designed my life to make sure I don't have to do it. And I think more and more people you know, we've had 60 new families arrive at the school in Phuket to start this new school year. One of our schools and other one of the schools has got more even more families than that and people are in Hong Kong. Hong Kong and Bangkok, they've been suffering through the pandemic, right and locked down in a city living apartments and outdoor space. And they're just saying what would swim to pack up and move and have a life and have space? Right? And that's, I think, you know, we're gonna see a different kind of migration in the future. And I'm looking forward to it. And we've got the tools you can be anywhere you just need, like no in 2009, or whatever it was when we first attempted to live in Phuket, my husband and I said, we need we need an international airport and a Wi Fi connection, and we can be anywhere we were a little bit early. Yeah, way of thinking. But you know, but then, you know, not even 10 years later, eight years later, we did it again. And it was the right time. So don't feel stuck. I think wherever you are, you can do anything. Everything's available to us. Now. We've got access to all information. You know, it's an opportunity to build new lives and take the stress out the business and the waste of time and the polluting travel and you know, all of it, so I'm excited about that. But Lucian for humanity. Yeah, absolutely. Anyway, so you've written five books, six books, seven books, how many?
Five of my iron? I was about 10 books. Yeah. Yeah. contributed to some of my clients books as well. And it's, it's amazing. I just find myself falling into books. And then I got my gosh, like, take a break. And my husband says, like, memorable. Books. That's like, Yeah, not for a while. Just keep imagined.
But for everyone who's listening who didn't finish high school didn't go to university. I mean, you know, here's a lady that finished school at 15. And went has gone on to do that, you know, just that should give people confidence to say, because I meet people and they don't have the confidence to follow their path, because they don't have a type of education, or they didn't finish this, or they didn't do that. But they've got this incredible gift in them and but sometimes going to get the extra qualifications gives them the confidence that they need. And if they need that, do it don't let anything stop you don't let anybody else's idea stop you, you know, the country girl, I embrace the country girl thing. It's been a huge blessing, you know, to being raised that wise, brilliant child. Yeah.
So and while I, you know, saying I met people at conferences that say, How would you do that. And, you know, when you're just from the country, I also met people who like from the city would say, if I had the choice of working with a city person, or a country person, I pick the country person every time, you know. So I saw that sometimes as a country person, we might just be limiting ourselves when other people I'm not saying it's like that. Yeah. And then the ones that do see us in a limiting way, it's just that they don't know, it's just that they haven't been here and seeing the amazing gifts that the country brings to the city and the world. Yeah.
Alright, let's now let's get on to your book, how to talk to strangers, subtitle to decrease anxiety, build confidence and make a bigger difference in the world. So like, you know, when we first met, we were talking about the whole concept of talking to strangers, give us a sort of a feel, what's what's, what's the intention behind this book?
Well, this book is just very much a gift to the world. So as you know, I was in India in March 2020. And hoping we could come to Phuket before we went anywhere else, came home from India. And you know, I'd already been brewing another book, because like my third book, which is the most well known is to talk to strangers, how to connect with anyone anywhere. And then I wrote the do total strangers travel toolkit, because I had all these amazing stories from connecting with people in the travels, and just wanting to encourage people to look beyond what you know, and connect with people that are different to you, even if it means traveling in your neighborhoods, and connecting with people from other cultures, other viewpoints perspectives, like getting them giving yourself an opportunity to hear other stories that expand your world, which you know, you do so beautifully through your work and your weekend reads and everything you do encourage people to see a fresh perspective, I would say you can travel through Andrea's price and her book, this one how to talk to strangers it was I felt like I was seeing online, people are still looking for how to and we could just have a promotion for the do talk to strangers book and just get that out in the world more. But you know, I love collaborating. And I feel like there's always more stories to tell. And I couldn't shake off this the three reasons that I wanted to move forward with this book, which are in the subtitle to decrease anxiety, build confidence and make a bigger difference in the world. Because I saw that just a fleeting connection with somebody can just diminish anxiety really quickly, when you're lost. And you ask for directions. And someone says here it is. And you're like, Oh, thank goodness. And that could actually be really pivotal in your day or your week. But the person who's just helped you as has gone on their way and they don't realize that it actually really mattered. So I want to honor those people that want to say thank you for connecting thank you for supporting strangers in brief moments. And I wanted to involve colleagues and friends to help them see what they bring to the world. Because these are not business stories. These are like everyday moments, and sometimes the extraordinary moments you wouldn't live through very often or, you know, very random kind of things. But yeah, I just thought let's look at how the little things make a big difference how an interaction can decrease somebody's anxiety, whether it's yours or whether it's somebody else's, you know how we can build someone's confidence just by speaking a word of encouragement. And so I asked my contributors to reflect on those moments where they'd help someone and when they're being helped as well. The biggest difference in the world you know, how what are the ripple effects we don't see because they're generally behind us.
just reminded me, I didn't have time to contribute to Karis book. And she asked me but I was in the I was in the middle of uncommon courage. So I guess I just, I just couldn't take on one more thing. But when I, when I first turned up in Singapore in 2003, I think it was one of the things. That's one of the beautiful things that I love about Australian culture. And it's something you don't necessarily see, as an Australian in Australia, if you've never really left, but people look at each other. You have interactions with strangers on a daily basis. And when I go home, and I sort of hate spending time with my family and stuff, I see it and it's just so beautiful. And I love it. And I miss it. And when I first got to Singapore, and this was before mobile phones, right? I I'd be walking down the street, and no one ever looked at me. No, it felt like nobody ever saw me. And you know, in those early days, when I'd be like, Oh, I don't know where I'm going, I don't know where I'm going. And I just go up to someone, and they do everything they could not to look at me, but I just go up to them. I said, I'm sorry, please, can you help me, I'm looking for directions, blah, blah, blah, and they would light up literally, they would light up and they would go overboard to help me, you know, find wherever it was, I was going. And that's when I first knew that I could fall in love with Singapore, because I knew that there was this this beauty there. But for some reason there's is people don't look at each other. And when you come from a capacitor, and you know, and then I found that in Australia as well, Americans are much more Hey, how you doing looking you in the eye but even in England, to an extent it was like that? No, people didn't invite you into their homes. It took about a year before a friend would come over for dinner. Whereas Australians meeting a weirdo on the street guy come over and have a barbecue tonight. You know, that's just the culture. So I totally resonate with that. All right, build confidence and make a bigger difference in the world.
And I just you just reminded me of something that's in the foreword by Masami Sato. He said, she said years ago, I was a very quiet, socially awkward and timid little girl in Japan, who had no idea what existed outside my own small community. I used to think that speaking to people I didn't know meant to potentially offending them being judged or hurting their feelings. So I mostly lived inside my mind imagining a world where we're all free. And I just saw that that just came to mind as you're sharing that story. Because those people in Singapore, they're just minding their own business. They're just not wanting to offend anyone. You know, they're just like, keep their eyes down. But I love that Masami also shared that imagining a world where we're all free, and you gave a sense of freedom to people that you connected with, and you experience that yourself to, you know, I love that graciousness in Singapore. I love that, you know, there's billboards over the highways that say, choose graciousness. And I've mentioned the Singapore kindness movement in the book, it was not just the contributors, but all the, you know, connections I've made, and I've seen where people are inspiring that kindness, that difference making in so many different ways.
Yeah. So when you when you people read this book, what do you want them to take away? What's the goal, it is a gift to give to the world right now, especially right now.
And so it's a gift to the reader in that you will realize, like, oh, it really matters, my little moments of eye contact, or friendliness, kindness, whether it's kind acts or just just that kind presence of letting letting somebody go through a doorway in front of you. You know, just recently, you know, our town has been in the most severe lockdown we've had ever and you know, at the supermarket, which I try not to go to this bait somebody on most occasions, who sees that I just have a few things and says, Go ahead of me. I'm like, that's so lovely. We're all Master, we can't see much of each other. But there's that graciousness. And and I think that comes out often, when we are all going through stuff. We're just more aware of others. And, you know, it's like who said was it Churchill never wasted good prices. So when we are in really dark times, we have that sense of connection that we haven't made time or space for when life's a bit more cruzi, we are aware that people are going through stuff. And so we're open to connect, and we're feeling the need to create solutions for some of the problems that we're facing. So yeah, it's a beautiful thing to celebrate. So I want people to see that they're making a difference, you know, and if you've been in that really dark place where you think, do I even matter? Like, why am I still living? Why don't I just, you know, end it all. When somebody so many people have said to me in there talking to strangers, stories of all kinds, just little interactions, crazy things that go it restored my faith in humanity. Okay, well, that's clearly important. So if you're walking on the street thinking, I don't even matter, and then somebody sees you, and smiles, steps out of the way just expresses some value in your humanity, it's, um, it can be an uplifting thing that helps you go on, you know, it's like, just to get you through that day. So your kindness can't really be an answer to somebody in that moment. He's been thinking that they're invisible, but they don't matter. Yeah. So it's like, it's from those moments where people are like, you know, on the ledge, just in a really hopeless situation to you know, people who are trying to solve global problems or local problems, and somebody's like, hey, how can I help you with that? It all matters. And so the book covers all kinds of situations. And um, you know, there's the funny stories, you know, like serene, told this story about finding herself in a love hotel. I'm like, I haven't heard of a love hotel. Ah, yeah, that's a thing. I didn't know that was a thing. Anyway, so that was hilarious. And, you know, and Masami been penniless in a country where her bank card wouldn't work at the ATM like have you ever I found yourself in that moment. And I found myself landing in Singapore one day going, where's my where's my wallet, and then I get a photo from Linden. And my wallet with all my credit cards and cash was under the bed and a fallen out of the suitcase. So I'm like, Okay, I'm in another country where I can't just go to the bank, then get money out and just stuck. I need to rely on the kindness of strangers. That was just a couple of years ago. But yeah, I mean, when Masami did it was, like 20 years ago, and she's any less out in the country in a foreign country where she doesn't share the language and, you know, relies on the kindness of strangers, and she shows her that, you know, really impacted how she is working in the world now and making such a phenomenal difference through a big one. Yeah, there's all the stories of beautiful moments that are planned or unplanned.
I was in the I was on a bus going to, I think it's called Haggadah, which is in the Red Sea of Egypt. on that bus, somebody stole my wallet. And I remember getting off and I got off the bus, when I realized that my wallet was gone. I had like traveler's checks hidden and stuff like that. So I couldn't get to a bank, I couldn't do anything about it where I was. And this English couple and obviously was such a long time ago, we haven't stayed connected. But this English couple said, you can come and share our room, which is beautiful. And then by the time I woke up, the next morning, they were gone. And they'd left like like, basically a few $100 under my pillow, which meant that I could get to where I needed to go to to be able to get some cash so I could keep moving. So though I know sort of stories, you know, just altering my life, you know, the kindness of strangers, as you're saying that we live in a world where everyone's everyone thinks everything is an exchange. Yeah. And you know, when when you think of karmic energy, it's not about it's not back and forth. It's around and around and around, right. And everything you give in, if you give him your whole heart, will it just magnifies the whole world. So it's wonder if people can move away from the exchange mindset?
Yes, yeah. And I find sometimes people ask me about my books, and particularly this one, you know, like, what's the business plan? It's like, this is this is not from carry fits the business. This is like, what I felt, you know, as the world is in crisis, how do I best serve the world? And I don't know, I can encourage people. And, you know, I can gather people's stories and share them. And yeah, it's not an exchange thing. It's, let's give a gift. And so I just love that really, the whole book is a gift. It's to the contributors, because as they write their stories, and they're challenged by my questions, I was challenged by my own questions about some of these moments, you know, took the vulnerability and courage to share, but also, because there's some awkward moments in the book, you know, it's like funny for the reader. But for the writer, it's like, should I share where the value is, but it's so it's a gift to the contributors to to reflect and to see the difference that they make. And I think everyone was really encouraged by seeing their stories in print, it's a gift to the reader in that you are encouraged and entertained by some of the stories, but then all the people that are impacted by the readers and writers, acts of kindness, and just the way that they're showing up in the world is that is beautiful. And a further gift is that every time somebody buys a copy of the book, or we gift it to somebody, we are giving water, like safe drinking water to families in need through big one. So every book represents at least one week of access to safe drinking water. So the ripple effects in this book are just going right around the world. And it's very exciting.
And you have to remember the case offering to do this at a time where her business is not flourishing as much as it could be if we weren't in this situation. So their ability to you know, and be one g one is an amazing organization, please don't check them out. Because they just do incredible work and make it so easy for us all to contribute. So I've been a member since January, thanks to you and other people, and I'm so thrilled to be part of that community. It's brilliant. It's beautiful. It's amazing. Yeah. But um, do you What about digital, so we're all sort of in this lockdown a bit. So to have a talk to strangers, people might be going on, it's a bit hard, because you know, it's not like I can get out we're trapped in our homes. So I mean, one thing I think of is the questions that you've asked him the book, maybe everyone could spend some time answering those questions, because that just give them about zero, remembering those moments. But what else from a digital perspective can people do? Do you think to help? Yeah, you know, meet new people speak to new people reach out to people, what do you think would be a good idea?
Absolutely. And just before we get to digital, because yeah, that's most of our connecting, but I think even if we have more awareness, and like in all of the talking to strangers, talks, or they do talk to strangers, how to talk to strangers, you know, got the asking model, which you know, starts with a for awareness. And if we can just increase our awareness of how we connect with others, like the conversation in our head, you know, whether we are like in a rush and you know, maybe cutting people off in traffic or in the supermarket, because we're anxious to get home and get out of like, a COVID zone. You know, if we're aware, that's when we start stepping aside, letting people through being gracious and I think that's super important right now, if we have very limited connection with other people, like maybe it's going to the shops once a week. Maybe it's like seeing people on a path or walking path to just be extra aware that you know, people might be in a really heightened state of fear and just Can people that extra space, you know, just to maybe wave, but just be more aware of how other people might be feeling? Also,
Can I just add one thing to that mix, which I think is really important? You said something earlier. Um, I've been wearing a mask a lot longer than you guys. But I've been masked up since February last year. It's really hot in the tropics, because it's hot, right? Yeah. But that's what we do. Everyone in Asia is doing and committed to it. You need to work harder. Your eyes smiles. Yes, that's the only I mean, it's hard like listening to people, because especially people would do speaking English as a second language. It's really difficult to understand with a mask when you can't see people's mouth. But when your eyes smiles, I put so much energy into my eyes smiles because I want people to know that I'm just walking past each other on the street or on the beach. I want them to have that human interaction, because I think you're right. It's a really important thing right now, face this face from each other is important, too.
Yeah, it says I see. And, you know, I've seen some really funny masks. And because, you know, we're right near a world famous zoo. And before the lockdown, we were going out and walking around the zoo, and they've got these masks that are like animal faces. And so yeah, they just kind of make you laugh when you see them. And you know, and you've got beautiful, you know, branded masks that Linda and I were to sew back to the digital space. Yeah, again, it's remembering or being aware that, you know, maybe people are going through stuff. So maybe they don't want my spammy message, like, you know, hey, I can sell you this, or, hey, I can promote your business. And sometimes I'm gonna say, you know what, look at my profile. Look at all my friends, a lot of like, experts in my world, why would a stranger just popping into my inbox for the first time? Grab my attention? And have me say, Yes, please tell me everything, you know, just be conscious that it is a brand new interaction. And, you know, I love the way that you do like dnn, you're facilitating conversations in a public space. It's like, you know, some cities have someone standing on a box in the park, you know, soap box, you can get up there for five minutes, share your story. And people might ask questions or whatever, this is what you're doing online. So you, you share your posts, you ask people their perspective. And if you're interacting in that public space, then when I send you a friend request, you'll be like, Oh, yeah, here's this person that's interacting, that really shares some thoughtful things. So
so the the key tip there is talk to people on social media. It's not a it's not a megaphone. It's an opportunity to talk to communicate. You know, if somebody posts something that you admire, tell them why you admire it. If you disagree with it, respectfully tell them why you disagree with it, start a conversation. That's what social media is all about. Social leadership is about integrity and service. It's about giving to each other. It's about you know, it's just about it's about human connection in the digital space. And I, you know, our friendship really developed on social media, because we didn't get to see each other physically, all these friends around the world. I've never met him, I've never met them, but we just resonate with each other based on what we share. So the power of social media is so not seen by so many. And we need the money to see it because we need the money to participate, because there's so many people who are not participating in a positive way. And that's the Bible conversation is happening on social media. Yeah, we need to be involved.
And you know, there's at least one person in the book that I haven't met face to face, but and several of the writers, Kaylee Chu and Conor O'Malley, who are both in Melbourne, they had written their chapters before I got to meet them face to face in December, January this year. Yeah, Simon in the UK, I saw who he was on LinkedIn, on his social media, he was, you know, just showing up so authentic and creative. And, you know, his business is called professional weirdos. So you just would love what he's gonna be like getting people to think outside the box. And yeah, I think having that respectful dialogue, when you disagree with somebody, you know, that can be really challenging, but if you feel like you just want to react and say, well, you're not seeing this, you know, walk away think that, you know, do I need to contribute to this conversation? How can I do that respectfully, let go of the emotion before you, you know, come in interaction, the conversation, and you know, and just love people and, and you do that, and I know that like I can disagree or say something very differently to you, but I can share, and you're still gonna love me, you're still gonna say, Well, this is how I see it. This is how it is. And I'm like, Okay, yeah, because I'm learning from you. We can be curious about someone else's perspective. If someone's gonna go online and say something that you just don't understand, then to view that through a lens of curiosity that helps to dissipate that that anchor point of disagreement. You know, I wonder what they've seen what they've experienced to to be saying what they're saying. And if we can have more thoughtful dialogue online? Yes, please.
Yeah. Well, just recently, you know, I put up a post that we needed to one of the veterans from the Afghanistan war, you know, because there was some, I was seeing some people that were going into that mode of criticizing the actual people on the ground, and I don't think that they deserve the criticism. I think they I think America rover, does the honoring of them post the Vietnam War where they were shamed. So I think they've gone too far. But you know, you know, I'm Australian Army, you're a military family, but the people on the ground, they're there for a reason, and a lot of them believe it, and whether we agree with that belief or Not if they do not deserve to be ridiculed, right? And so we had an interesting conversation and someone, someone was quite angry. And I was, I was like, just stop using those words, you know, to each other stop using negative critical words, you don't need to do that, because you're not actually achieving anything with the conversation, the person went away. And I don't know, if they left the group. I don't know how they felt afterwards, but it was just more don't use those words. You don't need to all these work talk, you know, don't use those words. It's horrible. No, it's really, and it's patronizing. And, you know, suddenly, suddenly, people are pontificating, and, you know, it's like, just use have conversations, respectful conversations. And if you differ in opinion, that's okay. And you might never get to agreement, then that's okay. But just be respectful, you know, and ask questions.
Yeah, like, I called a couple of veterans who, you know, who I imagine, one of them I knew was in Afghanistan, and another one, and I caught them both. And they were in different roles and different different regions of the Middle East. And, you know, they were both heartbroken in different ways, but they had different perspectives. And neither of those perspectives are in the media, you know, it's like what people actually go through, and their heart of service, you know, I saw some things that were really critical, you know, of defense or veterans from any country. And I just thought that comment is so way off base, they obviously don't my veterans that don't understand, you know, these people are signing up to serve, right? They are going they're supplying, you know, water and logistics and all kinds of things that you can't just make assumptions, you know, based on one war story that you've read. And so I think it's so important more than ever to, to ask questions without judgment without agenda to be curious and to be empathetic. Because if people have, you know, it's very easy to just make comments about some country you've never been to, but when you've been there, you know, the people, then you're gonna feel strongly in comparison to somebody who's just reading something in the news and having an opinion. Yeah. So yeah, let's come back to curiosity, empathy, and meaning listening. Absolutely.
All right. So a couple of favorite stories in the book that maybe made you laugh
or think deeper silence shares a story about when he was young, and he was wanting to become more confident. So a lot of readers want to be more confident to connection in various ways. So he read a book and I got some tips. And so then he went out to an amusement park, and he decided he was going to talk to strangers, he was so anxious about how he was going to, like, start a conversation with a stranger, but he's got to enjoy all the ride that the show. And so at the end of the day, there's a guy standing in front of him, and he's like, right, I'm gonna do it. I'm not gonna share it, because it's just, it's just process to read it. I think he might have shared it on my podcast that's coming up soon, but it was just lovely to read his, like, just honest, awkward growing pains of you know, how do I connect? And he also shared about, you know, when he likes a girl, and, you know, how do you have that conversation and there was a couple of emergency stories, Kathy Johnson had a dramatic story where she was helping someone whose finger was severed, you know, calming the person, you know, retrieving the finger and getting them both to hospital, you know, there's some really beautiful comedy and, you know, there's fires, there's, I think might be floods, and this is all kinds of dramas, and, and beautiful moments, you know, like my husband, Linda, and this is the first time he's written stories from one of my books. He's contributed and helped in so many other ways. And Nathan Shula has also been involved in every book I've ever done. And, you know, it's like my creative genius guide. Legend. But yeah, like when I sat with him doing do talk to strangers, and he shared stories about how he, you know, we just make a slice or chocolate cake or something for people who knew in the neighborhood just to welcome them. And you know, he just does all these kinds of things that people wouldn't know about. And I said to him, I want your stories to but yeah, he went through quite a crisis when his brother was, you know, on death's door in Sydney. And yeah, the kindness of a stranger taking him to the circus and his sister. Yeah, and how just little thoughtful things can really lift you when you're going through a dark time. So yeah, there's so many beautiful stories right around
the world, and it lifts you and it lifts others remember jaaxy used to cry every time you got a haircut when he was a baby. And then one day we were in Australia one day, this guy just walked in and gave him a Frodo freddo frog, which is a very traditional piece of Australian chocolate, right? So it stopped him crying and he got his hair cut and I think that was might maybe the moment that he stopped carrying on like a pork chop every time we got a haircut. I don't know what it was about getting a haircut. But anyway, but yeah, those sort of moments like let's let's all give the gift doesn't have to be a financial gift. rather just it's time it's attention. It's Yeah, and it changes the world, you know?
Yes. Yeah. And a key word there is attention, you know, because people say, you know, don't take candy from strangers, you know, don't give lollies to strangers, but someone did, but you were there and you obviously approved the chocolate giving and it was a gift like to you and Yes,
exactly. And also to the person that gave it right. They walked away feeling feeling awesome about themselves and yeah, so there's four people impacted. Yeah, yeah. And I'll never forget that jacksie will obviously was too young. But yeah, beautiful. So let's all be more beautiful because that's what we need in the world to make the world a better place. And we need to value the things that are important. So a friend of mine, her name is little brain and she's like a travel blogger. She wrote us an amazing blog, I have to share it with you about afternoon tea at one of the big What is it? The oriental in Bangkok? Yeah. And oh, my God, the way she explained, afternoon tea was just so beautiful. But because she's English, she also went back to the heritage of afternoon tea in her life and how her mom, dad used to sit down in the afternoon and have afternoon tea and the grandparents. You know, it was obviously tea store tradition, right? And I was just reading it. And I was like, when did we forget to prioritize the important things in life? When do we when do we all accept them running so fast every day that no one spends any time doing anything that matters anymore? When when do we accept that, you know, when do we accept these desperation, to earn more money to afford these properties so that we can have this life and, you know, we and obviously, all of this is cumulating, to this incredible climate crisis that we're dealing with, because the focus on stuff and bigger and more and you know, sort of, we're all out of control. But I think if we could all take a deep breath and just go, let's remember what's important. And that's why I think your work is really important, because you're reminding people one of the most important things and that's connecting with other humans, the impact it can make on their life. So thank you.
Yeah. And the slowing down that you mentioned, you know, yes, we need to slow down and connect with ourselves in order to be able to connect well with others. So yeah, we do need to do a different pace. And I think COVID is given us the opportunity to do that, you know, we're not going anywhere, except for walks around the neighborhood. And just appreciating nature. You know, and even when we were in two weeks isolation after India, you know, we just sat in the backyard and just, you know, touched the leaves and slowed down. And it because if like stress happens in a rush, and you know, we can't just slow ourselves down instantly, that can be pretty quick, if we choose to, to just take that moment to step out of that panic and just breathe and just, you know, hold a leaf or just hold your own hands and just slow your breathing down, then we can step into that awareness and then start having an impact on others too.
And then once COVID is over, we've got to start understanding that the way that we live our lives can never be as big as it was, again, because we can't afford to keep living the way we were. If we want to give our children a survivable planet, right. So this is this is a time of adjustment. And you know, when I came to terms with what I had to let go as far as the way I live my life, there is a period of mourning, because I know you love it, too. You love getting out there you love traveling, right? We have to recognize that the life in the future is going to be different and get ready for that. Yeah. All right. So let's just wrapping up. One of the things I'm obviously noticing in Australia is that there's, there's a lot of depression, a lot of sorrow, anxiety, Australia kind of got the tail end of COVID. As far as how it's sort of gone around the world, we've kind of been sitting in it right since the beginning, Thailand was the first country with the first infection outside of China. So I kind of feel like I've been on the roads and start, what's your message of hope for the world? What would you like, not just people in Australia, but around the world? Because a friend Tim Wade said, he feels like the whole world's in a depression? What? Yeah, what's your message for everybody to give to sort of, I can't see a way out can't see the light, you know, I
think it really helps to step back and see this time in history from a bigger perspective. And, you know, I'm so grateful that I had all four of my grandparents live into their late 90s. And so, you know, we heard their war stories. And we know, they went through times that they probably thought would never end that was like so dark that you know, you would have been so angry with the world and with governments and with the way that everything was was unfolding it, it would feel like the end. And we know that that wasn't the end. And when they they look back, like my grandmother before she died at 95. She said I've had a wonderful life. And as she reflected on her life, she talks about like the family, the people she didn't talk about, like her child that was accidentally killed by a nurse. She didn't talk about the war and the devastation of her, her husband being on the front line. And then him having a stroke and not being able to not Australia, a brain tumor. But after surgery, he looked like he had a stroke, you know, having to relearn to speak like she didn't talk about the crisis of her life. She talked about all the gifts, and I just learned that from my grandparents, if we can look at the gifts that are in our lives and in the people around us, then that gives us a sense of hope. And we need to look for the hope just like when it's a cloudy day, there's like sun beyond the clouds. It's like we might not see it at the moment, you know, or we might see like a hint of it. There's a silver lining, we don't always see it, but we know that it's there. And so to step back from looking at what's happening right now, like this year, what about in the expense of a lifetime and there are so many good things happening in the world. You know, there are so many people who are you know, cleaning up beaches, for example, in Mumbai, like when I went there in 2017 the beach was like pomanders it was like a rubbish dump and I've never seen anything like it coming from you know, the Australian beaches. I Now people have been out there because when you see a crisis, then you go, oh, man, we've let this go too long, we need to pay attention. So people are paying attention. And there are beautiful things happening everywhere. And you are one of those beautiful happenings that is really raising awareness of, you know, challenges in the world and solutions and people who are coming together to create solutions in so many different ways. So there is always high and I think it was, maybe it's the Kokoda movie, it was a world war two movie, and I remember the one of the veterans saying, you know, when this life is hope, like we're still breathing, and the other day, I did a session with a team in the Philippines. And, you know, I just asked this question, just put it in the chat, you know, what are you grateful for right now. And, you know, they were saying they're grateful to be alive, grateful to be recovering from the virus, grateful for their families grateful for their, their fairy friends, you know, those little things that they're grateful for a plant in their office. So there is always something that can be grateful for and, and that gives us a sense of hope. Oh,
so get involved, just get involved in something, you know, whether it's taking care of people, cleaning up the beaches, action is always the best thing to do, especially if you're feeling bleak. But get involved wherever you can, whatever makes sense for you. It can be big, it can be small, you know, there's so many people in need right now, if you if all you can do is donate the World Food Program is feeding, you know, there's 20 countries facing famine in the world. 20 countries, right. We're facing a humanitarian crisis. And it's building as we speak off the back of COVID, and the economic catastrophe that's been caused, but it was also going to come with the climate crisis. And all these wars that merge in wars and climate together. It's just like, we've got so many. So we've got to get, we've got to keep our minds healthy. We've got to look at everything from a big picture perspective, like you said, but get involved and don't give up hope, because we are the hope of the future. And if we can come together and create, you know, the path forward that helps most people live with some dignity and respect and you're not starving, then we can do that we don't have the dark path is not the only option available to us. And exactly too many people are talking in leadership positions like it is government leadership, it doesn't have to be we, we can make that happen. And we have to believe that we can and that's kind of my bigger message. You know, come on, let's do it. I don't want my guests facing that. I don't want your kids facing that, you know, yeah.
And I, you know, I just want to reiterate that words are so powerful. And yes, if you can donate but if you're one of the people that has no income, you know, if we don't have finances to donate if you're wondering where your next meal is going to come from, but if you've still got a smartphone, you can be following people who are sharing a message of hope you can be encouraging them, you know, if you're going to get online, if you're going to tweet, if you're going to comment, make those words count. And you know, don't just like share an inspiring quote, if you're going to share it, then share what it is about that that is helpful for you. I think as we share it with our words and encouragement, even if it's you know, saying I needed this today, then use that words. use that word generously.
Yeah, absolutely. We are all more powerful than we know. All right. Thank you. Thank you so much. My darling, I'm so happy you joined me today. How can people find you? What's the best way to find you?
All the socials Carrie Phipps and Carrie Fitz, calm. And, you know, send me a note to say that Andrea is the reason that we're connecting. That's probably the best way to get a quick response from me like, Oh, my gosh, this is a friend of mine. Yeah. But you know, as Andrea, which would a great day, just like follow someone on LinkedIn or just send a friend request, but make a comment or connection. Like, how is it that we're connecting today? So yeah, and giving you a shout out for your podcast at the same time. Thanks, Mike. And
remember how to talk to strangers go and check it out. I'll put it in the link. And if you know all of the money that's being made, and this is gonna go to water, right, providing water, any safe drinking water safe drinking water, which for people who live in countries with clean drinking water, you probably don't even appreciate how important that is.
Yeah. And it's paying for the cost of the book, too. Yeah. But there is, at least, at least some giving on every single book, whether they give it or sell it.
Yeah. So good on you, mate. And thank you, darling. Thank you for joining us. And we will see you very, very soon.
Yes, I hope so. No, thank you. Carry and carry tells you what to do who write it all down, put it in the list, give it a bit of a spin, give it a bit of a twist, make all the actions and get results. That's what the books about it's for adults.
But as you can probably tell Carrie and I can speak for hours and hours and hours. And we only really just getting started. So Carrie, you might have to come back soon. And big shout out to our friend at work. Mary I had to use your soundtrack today because Carrie and I know you every time I listen to it, I just laugh and my kids My kids love it too. It's for adults. That's one of Lexi's favorite lines. I like the ear. So anyway, thanks for Joining us it's been fun. I've loved talking to Carrie. She's super inspirational. I'll leave links to where you can find her and her book in the show notes. And let's see who I bring up next time. Excited to do these conversations. I think if you know me, that's something you'll work out. I'll have a good chat.